So this is what this is for...

Ok, this is what I am writing this for...

Today I realized something HUGE! I have realized that the man of my dreams is just that, a dream. Its not real and I must look for the man of my life. I have been looking for love for my entire life.
Today I finally realized it comes in the most unconventional places. I was talking to my friend Elizabeth and as we got off the phone she goes, "I love you" and I said, "I love you too!" Finally I have found a profound love lol. I have all the love I need in my friends. I don't need a man, I have my girls and my family and they provide me with more love than I could ever ask for!
Most recently I have added a guy to my circle. I met this guy, Joshua, through my ex. My ex and I met him the same night and somehow Joshua and I made a great connection. We became quick friends. When my ex and I split, I called Joshua to talk and cry, etc. He has become one of my very best friends. He is there for me 24/7. He is an amazing man. Yes, I said man! He is fucking amazing... the more I learn about him and the more time we spend together, I have begun to realize that he is an amazing individual.
Joshua works for the US Corps of Engineers. He wants to work for the government as an environmental consultant. After that he hopes to become and environmental consultant for large corporations. He wants a career that makes him feel good about what he does and is not overly worried about how much money he makes. Even though this will surprise a lot of people I am the same way. I want a career that makes me feel good, that allows me time with my family, even if it means that I will have to cut back on my life style.
Joshua and I have spent so much time together lately and I have begun to realize that he is the type of man I envision spending my life with. He answers my phone calls. Cares what I think and feel, and generally cares about me and my well being. He is quickly becoming one of my very best friends and I am finding myself falling for him.
Joshua is recently (2months) out of a 1 1/2 yr long relationship. We are great friends and I pray that after the both of us get our lives on track we will turn our friendship into a relationship. I think I have found the man of my life.